nervous system healing
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The Bloodbath of Healing
People don’t understand that healing isn’t a glow-up. It’s a bloodbath. It’s standing in the wreckage of everything you tolerated and realizing the monster wasn’t just him – it was the version of you that stayed. The one who kept… Continue reading
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Holding It All Together Nearly Broke Me
I didn’t notice the burnout at first. I just thought I was tired. Of course I was tired. But then the tired didn’t go away. It didn’t matter how much I slept – or didn’t. I’d wake up with heaviness… Continue reading
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I Built the Life. Then My Body Broke Down.
For years, I didn’t stop. Work all day, come home and mother, then study deep into the night. Some nights I was up until two, sometimes three in the morning, chasing a degree that felt like survival, not ambition. People… Continue reading
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For Me. For Him. For Us.
I used to think healing meant finding the right words to make people understand. To explain why I stayed so long. Why I kept hoping. Why I kept trying to make it work when it was already broken. I wanted… Continue reading
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Slow Isn’t Boring When It Feels Like Safety
I don’t know how to explain it. The way I feel pulled toward you, even when I’m doing everything I can to keep my distance. It’s not about fear of you – it’s what you bring up in me. You… Continue reading
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Where the Shaking Comes From
I used to spiral when it happened. The tight chest. The sudden urge to flee a room that felt perfectly safe a second ago. I’d call myself dramatic. Weak. I’d ask what was wrong with me, why I couldn’t just… Continue reading
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The Hour That Saved Me: Finding Safety Before the World Woke Up
Some mornings I’d quietly slip out of bed while it was still dark. I didn’t turn on the lights. I didn’t make a sound. I just needed that one hour where I wasn’t being watched, evaluated, or interrupted. An hour… Continue reading
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Trust, Taught Gently
If I’m slow to trust, it’s because my body remembers what my mind learned too young. That love could turn cold without warning. That closeness didn’t always mean safety. I learned to read between the lines of someone’s tone, to… Continue reading
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When the Ache Isn’t Physical
There are nights where I feel it in my shoulders first – a dull heaviness that sinks in without warning. Then in my chest. My back. My legs. A full-body ache that doesn’t have a source I can name. No… Continue reading
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The Silence That Startles Me
Some days, nothing looks wrong on the outside. The coffee is warm. The morning is quiet. The world moves normally. But then something small – a sharp tone, footsteps too loud, a door closing a little too hard – lands… Continue reading
Light Calls To Light 